How to Unlearn Your Need to Be Liked
Do you often find yourself worrying about what others think of you or trying to please everyone around you? Do you have a hard time saying no or feel like you can't be yourself?
You are not alone! It's natural to want to be liked and accepted, but it's also important to realize that there is a difference between being liked and having healthy relationships.
Discover tips on how to move away from the need to be liked and instead focus on becoming more self-reliant and confident in who you are. Let’s get started!
Break the Urge to Please: The Journey to Joyful Independence
We all want to be liked, it’s a fundamental part of being human. We often unknowingly construct our lives around the desire to be accepted and appreciated by others. However, this need for approval can lead us down a path that doesn’t always serve us in the best way.
We are hardwired to avoid rejection.
The problem is, when we are trying to keep up with our need to be liked and be accepted, it can keep us from doing the things that matter to us. (Cue the “but what will so and so think?!”)
The worst part? This often leads to feelings of inadequacy and stress about meeting expectations. You might be thinking, “Paige, that’s great, but how do I get past this needing to be liked so I can meet my true potential?” I’m glad you asked, I’ll tell you!
But first, one more thing, remember, unlearning your need to be liked is not selfish. It is about choosing yourself and what is best for you, instead of chasing someone else’s approval.
Leaving the Pleaser's Role Behind: Putting Yourself First
If you have been a people pleaser your entire life, it can be challenging to stop striving for that need to be liked and accepted. Try the following:
#1. Create an Atmosphere that Nourishes Self-Focus
Regrettably, a lot of people choose to live in situations that emphasize a "fake" version of who they are. Immersing yourself in a setting that feeds the authentic you is the first step towards unlearning your need to be liked.
This can entail severing links with persons in your life who are toxic or who don't bring out the best in you. You might need to limit your interactions with some people since they might make you more inclined to satisfy others.
If you want to unlearn the need to be liked, start with your environment:
Remove yourself from negative relationships and individuals.
Spend time with your loved ones and disconnect from social media.
Stop engaging in activities that don't bring you joy or advance your goals.
These are all good places to start!
#2. Discover Your Value Beyond Likes
It’s easy to tie your worth to the likes that you get on your social media accounts, but this can end up affecting your self-esteem big time.
You are worthy. You don’t need anyone’s approval.
Reframe your mindset that someone else’s approval will somehow boost your self-worth or happiness.
Repeat this affirmation to yourself daily until you believe it: “ "I am worthy no matter if I get other people's approval. I don’t need to be liked by everyone.”
#3. Start Small
It will take practice to overcome this ingrained tendency and get past it. Change never happens overnight!
Start small by pursuing one thing a day that is just for you; not the approval or likes of someone else or followers on social media.
Ask yourself what you value and what you want for your life. Align your actions with these goals and values. Start making decisions based on what is right for you, and stop making them to please someone else. This can be liberating!
Tap Into Positive Thinking > Affirmations for a Brighter Future
Change is a Journey
It is important to remember that you are the only one who can decide how to live your life. Don't let worries about what others think of you hinder your growth and success. YOU have the power to choose your path, so make sure it is a path that aligns with your true values and goals.
Like any journey, it takes time to work through each emotion and develop a deeper understanding of how you can heal from within from needing to be liked. With the Emotional Polarity Technique™, you can take small steps on your healing path and move forward toward personal liberation.
With the right mindset, anything is possible! Contact me, Paige Cargioli, to schedule an EPT™ session today!